Saturday, December 31, 2011

happy new year, lovelies.

in 2012, just remember: 
wherever you go, go with all your heart.
you don't have to be extraordinary, just forgiving.
<3


Friday, December 30, 2011

a gift she left us all..

as i got off work tonight, i pictured myself coming home, kicking off my boots, cleaning the house, drinking a beer, writing my grandparents a letter, and giving myself a pedicure. 
instead, for the last 2 hours i've been in the same position (with my boots still on) sitting in front of my computer.
this is what my reality is. 
tonight, however, something changed.
every so often, i go onto facebook and read the beautiful, tragic words written by the friends and family of danielle vacca. and every time, without fail, i am overcome with a sense of deep, piercing sadness harmonized with a quiet sense of inspiration. i find myself wiping the tears away, hours after i've read the messages... 
the words linger inside me as i picture the person she was through the image painted by the people who loved her the most.

i'm overwhelmed with an inspiration to be like her. i want to live life as fully devoted and as deeply as she did..




i feel as if we're given a chance to be something... to answer the calling inside of us.
we are given an opportunity, a chance that is destroyed only by our own fears and doubts.
if only we understood (myself included) that the only thing that is stopping us from becoming who we're meant to be is merely the ideas we create. we imagine failure, pain, or shame when, in all reality, the circumstances and opportunities are already available to us. all we have to do is open our eyes and trust ourselves and do what you feel is right.


i want my existence to matter. i want to help, and to change, and to build something i'm proud of. i'm ready to redefine what my reality is..


thank you, dani, for inspiring me to be half the amazing woman that you were, are, and continue to be.

Thursday, December 29, 2011

osho the great!

favorite quotations by the most interesting man i've read.

I have condensed the whole religion into a single word: meditation.

My religion is a religion of sharing, not of following. It is a religion of love.

Each act is either its own punishment or its own reward. If it is arising out of your reality it brings great joy, beauty, bliss, benediction. If it is arising out of some false idea it brings misery, pain, suffering. That's what hell is.

The whole art of meditation is just to turn your consciousness inwards, so that you can become acquainted with yourself. You are not yet introduced to yourself. You know what your name is -- but you did not come with that name; that label has been put by others. You know you are a Christian, a Hindu, a Jew -- but you were not born as a Hindu, as a Mohammedan, as a Christian.

God is not a goal; God is the presence right now. If you are present, God is available. If you live in the moment, you are enlightened; there is no other enlightenment. And then ordinary life is so extraordinary. Then to be just a nobody is so fulfilling.

Meditation is the way from the head to the heart, from the heart to the being.

Pleasure is dependent on others. Happiness is not so dependent on others, but still it is separate from you. Bliss is not dependent, is not separate either; it is your very being, it is your very nature. To attain it is to attain to God, to nirvana.

Obsession is created by your so-called saints. Whatsoever they condemn becomes your obsession. In fact, the more they condemn, the more attractive it becomes, the more magnetic it becomes.

Desire is our imprisonment. The man who wants nothing, who is absolutely contented as he is, is free of all bondage. He has attained to ultimate freedom, nirvana -- and that is the goal of life. And it is only by attaining that freedom that you will know the significance of being, the song of being, the celebration of being. Your life will become a continuous bliss, and not only that YOU will be blissful, you will be able to bless others too. The whole existence will be blessed by you, by your very presence.

Unless you become conscious, unless you take possession of your own life, unless you become independent of your instincts, you will not be a master. And without being a master there is no bliss, no benediction; life remains a hell.

The whole humanity is suffering from obsession, either through indulgence or through repression. The whole humanity is concerned with sex twenty-four hours a day.

Meditation is the only thing that can transform a man into a spiritual being, without making him Hindu, Christian, Mohammedan. Meditation can release all his potential and intelligence.






Wednesday, December 28, 2011

pictures speak a thousand words..























christmas with the brandons!

livis' note to the kitty.

buns and christmas-red lips!

opening the cutest present from blakers.

thrashed!

sassy lil' sister.


she gets her craziness from me.

so cute.

lil' nuggets

cash cab game! "don't you know ANY foreign languages?!" -ben, the pretentious intellectual.


one scarf, three variations 


the beautiful catherine and myself!

stink eye!

"yew whino!" 


love my mom and he rmany  talents.



ben's awesome photography.

it was a wonderful christmas, it just reminds me how much i have and how much i'm loved.